Sorry I've been so out of it, folks. I'm not gonna promise that I'll be more attentive though. There's an odd point of inertia where I realize it's been so long since I checked LJ, and I have nothing to report...or rather, nothing I really want to report, and I look at the F list and see way too many entries going so far back, I just don't feel ( Read more... )

I just got back from Portland, visiting the old lady ( Read more... )

I've been in a funk lately. A little over a week ago, I had another "window watcher" experience, like the one some of my readers may remember from a few years ago. This one was slightly different in that the guy on the street didn't just look up and see me and stop and check me out. He had apparently seen me once in my window when he walked by. ( Read more... )

I only just now remembered that today, January 2nd, 2008, is the anniversary of my HIV diagnosis. Been poz...and healthy...for seven years now. It doesn't mean as much to me as it once did. It's weird how this Before and After mentality plays with my mind. When I was still HIV-, I met HIV+ men and...well, they were HIV+ and it never really occurred ( Read more... )

This post is inspired by a recent conversation with yami, with whom I discovered I agree with more than I thought.

Here is Wikipedia's definition of "mysticism"

Of importance to my arguments:

"Mysticism (from the Greek μυστικός (mystikos) "an initiate" (of the Eleusinian Mysteries, μυστήρια (mysteria) meaning "initiation"[1])) is the pursuit of ( Read more... )

( Sometimes enlightenment is very painful. )

When thinking about how I describe my spiritual views and leanings, I tend to call myself a gnostic existentialist. Once in a while I use the phrase in the company of others, but only if their ideas and mindsets are similar enough to mine and if they have enough education, that they can, more or less, understand the meaning, without my having to ( Read more... )

So I got my Darth Vader tattoo finished yesterday. I will post pics when it's fully healed ( Read more... )

So I'm in QFC today and I hear a crash and look to see that a couple of adults are standing in an aisle, with a small child and it looks like the child smashed a jar of food. The adults are standing there smiling and laughing, and their child is laughing too, and one of them says, in a joking voice, "Oops. Clean up on Aisle 4" and they laugh some ( Read more... )

So for the last two or three weeks, depression has been sitting on my face. Assuming it isn't just a seratonin or dopamine disorder, some of this is a bit of loneliness, but a lot of it is closer to what some folk call "cosmic loneliness" or "mid-life crisis ( Read more... )